GISHWHES III Commandments

As a participant of GISHWHES you agree to abide by the "Gishwhes Rules and Regulations" and the "Gishwhes Liability Waiver." In addition to these agreements, you must strictly adhere to the following commandments. If you violate the rules and regulations or break a commandment, you and your team become eligible for immediate disqualification. Also, your children will be forever banned from participating in GISHWHES, and their children, and their children's children. So listen up....

1. Registration: You are only permitted to compete in GISHWHES and be eligible for the grand prize if you register, pay and electronically sign all registration documentation. Homo sapiens of any age may compete, but all participants must read the Gishwhes Rules and Regulations for details on their eligibility and Grand Prize age requirements.

2. Rights. We intend to share your spectacular item submissions with the world. Therefore, by competing in the contest, you agree to the following: "By submitting links, videos, images or text content ("Content") to Gishwhes via links, emails or files, you are granting GISHWHES, LLC and its related companies and managers ALL RIGHTS related to ownership and distribution of said Content in perpetuity. Such Content may be distributed, shown, or broadcast in any medium at any time to any audience during this time period." We also may burn, your works in effigy for dramatic effect.

3. Behavior. You are not permitted to physically, emotionally or psychologically hurt or attack yourself, another GISHWHESHEAN, or their grandparents during the Hunt.*

4. Retribution. If you experience anger, frustration or hostility towards another during the Hunt, you must understand that these are natural, normal feelings. If you find yourself overwhelmed by these emotions, you are permitted to coordinate and attend a “dance-off” with the individual who has pissed you off. This dance off must be set to music, consist of no more than 20 seconds, involve two songs, and at least 2 recognizable dance moves. Please provide a video link of this event to missjeanlouis@gishwhes.com our rules enforcer. If all directions are followed, we shall take immediate action.**

5. Breaking the Law. You are not permitted to break any law in attempt to scavenge an item. Gishwhes will not be responsible if you break any law.***

6. Scavenging Safety. First rule when scavenging: be safe. Second rule when scavenging: you are not who you think you are. Act accordingly.

7. Decency. We do not condone decency; however, you shall not submit any pornographic images or videos for your item submissions.

8. Item Interpretation: Do not reinterpret items. Provide the item exactly as it is requested. If the item reads "A photo of you standing with the Queen of England," we don't want you in front of a picture of the Queen, or you in front of an action figure of the Queen. It must be a photo of you with the Royal Mum in the living flesh. If you choose to "interpret" you have a 97.67% chance of getting 0 points. We are serious about this. So if we ask for a photo of you somewhere, we don't want a "photoshopped" version of this, we really want you in that location. However, because we don't like to draw lines in the sand or hamper creativity, if your interpretation is a TRULY inspired combination of creative genius and hard work, we might award you a few points, but it would have to be outstanding in every way. Otherwise, you will get nothing. In the past, teams have been bumped out of first place for too much reinterpreting of items. We are looking for the actual thing we say we are asking for not a cheeky version of that thing.

9. Submissions Secret Tip #1 - Take in-focus pictures and videos. Be artistic. Artistic wins. Not artistic? Not a problem. You can still win by being precise! Do excellent on your submissions. We will award extra points for extra awesome submissions.

10. Submissions Secret Tip #2 - Quantity won't win this contest if the items aren't precise. Quality is important.

11. Submissions Secret Tip #3 - Have fun. If you're having fun, making or doing an item, odds are the result will be great. In other words, before tackling an item, figure out how to make the process fun.

12. Submissions Process. Submit Items by clicking on our "Item List" on our website, and then on the item you want to submit. Then follow instructions.****

13. Submission Formats. You need to submit your videos by providing links to them at http://www.youtube.com. Photo links must be submitted via http://imgur.com. Be sure to mark your videos "unlisted" on Youtube so that we can see them but no one else can.

14. Altering Photos/Videos. Unless an item specifically asks for manipulation of photos or videos, you are not permitted to do so. Numerous teams cheated last year by "photoshopping" in props or otherwise manipulating photos and had items disqualified. We have several graphic designers on staff who can spot an expert job as easily as a rookie one.

15. Scoring. Each item will have a point value associated with it. The judges may assign additional points to items that are most excellently scavenged - meaning the photograph or video is exactly what we are asking for, executed to scientific, athletic or artistic perfection. The winning team will likely have multiple items that have been granted extra points for awesomesauceness.

15.a Run!

16. Complaining. You shall not complain, gripe, whine, whinge, or lobby or bribe Misha Collins, Miss Jean Louis, or any of the GISHWHES staff or volunteers. You may, however, fondly shout their names in a public place followed by a salute in the northeastern direction.

17. Updates. You shall check GISHWHES's Updates Page on a daily basis during the Hunt for updates. Items may be added or removed from the list, or rules may be changed mid-hunt, so stay on it.

18. Networking. We had some problems last year with a certain high-profile billionaire family that outsourced the completion of all of their items to the inmates of a Siberian labor camp (and bragged about their accomplishments during a meeting with Putin). This family (not the prisoners) has been forbidden from competing in Gishwhes this year. Although we encourage you to reach out to family, friends, neighbors, students, teachers and your social media communities to assist you with gathering props, making artwork, serving as additional bodies in your multi-person photos and videos, connecting you to people and places, and otherwise assist you with the creation of the items, we expect YOU and YOUR TEAM to coordinate and complete the majority of the items. Yes, this is a fine line. How do you know if you crossed it? If you just email the items list to your assistant and then spend the entire week of the hunt partying with your DJ friends in Ibiza, you've probably crossed it. DO NOT email our support to ask questions regarding this commandment. You be the judge... and then we will.

19. Video/Image Plagiarism. You shall not submit any items that were created by another team. Any team that is caught submitting another team's item shall be eligible for disqualification. You may not submit any items that were taken before this year's hunt. You may not submit any items that cause digestive bloating to the viewer. Reminder: with Google image search it is a simple process of confirming the originality of images and videos. We have algorithms and ex-NSA hackers on our team and we will ferret out fraudulent submissions and immediately disqualify all members of the offenders' teams.

20. Dietary Restrictions. This is a "no dehydrated milk" event. You may use actual milk, or soy milk but not hemp or pistacchio milk. You may however, use copious amounts of deviled egg filling. As long as it is eaten with no hands and while you're blindfolded.*****

20.a Laughing will get you nowhere in life. Try "tongue-waiving".

21. Scoring. Team scores shall be compiled by tallying up the total points accumulated by the team. In our final judging, an item's points may be increased or decreased based on the quality of the submission. Last year the winning team won by not only submitting items worth lots of points, but by accumulating bonus points for excellent submissions.

22. Content Sharing. You may not "share" your images or videos until after the Hunt, but you may not password-protect them either. Violators will be attacked by Gishbot.

23. Personal Hygiene. No participant of any sex may trim armpit hair (their own or others) during the hunt. All participants of any sex must trim their chest hair during the hunt. ******

24. Pleasure. You shall enjoy the Hunt. You shall relish the hunt. You shall make new friends. You shall experience moments of elation and transcendence.

25. Judging. Items shall be judged by Misha Collins, Miss Jean Louis and 8 volunteers (we lost 3 to insanity last year) that are in the "service" of Miss Jean Louis (but have expressed that they are not happy about it).

26. Teammate Complaints. You shall not complain to or about another teammate. If they are not contributing their talents or time, it shall be their loss as victory shall be less sweet or defeat shall rest on their self-loathing shoulders.

27. End of the Hunt. The Hunt shall end when the countdown clock reaches 00:00 and the Item List is removed from the GISHWHES website.

27.a Whenever your parent or best friend asks you to do a "favor", write down the favor and present it to them as an invoice.

28. Arbitrary Rules and Constraints. May be placed on the Updates page during the course of the Hunt. Watch it daily.

29. Grand Prize. The judges will be selecting one winning team. The entire winning team will be treated to an all expense paid 3-day adventure to Vancouver, Canada to take a chartered seaplane to a majestic island to join Misha Collins for fish stew, a séance and a Viking surprise! Prize winners will have airfare, accommodations, transportation and meals paid for. They will be treated like the royalty that they really are.

30. Referrer Prize: We shall also select one "Referrer" individual to join the Winning Team. Refer a friend (you can do so after you register). If they sign up, your name will be placed in a random drawing to join the Winning Team on the Grand Prize trip. The more you refer, the higher your chances of winning.

31. Runner Ups. We will select 5 runner-up teams. These teams will receive accolades, prizes and the envy of everyone (except the winning team).

32. GISHWHES Hall of Fame. Think you have no chance of winning or even being a runner-up? Wrong! If you are convinced you won't win the grand prize, you can still wow us! Select a handful of items to complete and make them the most amazing items the world has ever seen. If your team's item is chosen as the best of the best by our judges, it (and your team) will be forever memorialized in the Gishwhes Hall of Fame. Your item and team will be seen forever on our website and in a book we will periodically publish. These will be items that make the stuff of legends...

33. Luck. Good is the best kind. It can be found across the aisle from bad and next to hard.

34. Advice. Be precise. Be creative. Be courageous. Be shameless. Be GISHWHES.

  • *you are, however, encouraged to "behave" strangely at all times.
  • **Or we might do nothing depending on how the mood strikes us.
  • ***We will however, take responsibility if during the hunt you win the lottery. We expect to be compensated accordingly.
  • ****Do not submit your items by carrier pidgeon unless the item specifically calls on you to make a submission by carrier pidgeon.
  • *****We were going to make this a no-anchovy event, but our good friends at the Association of Spain's Seafood Boat Underwater Trolling and Trapping [A.S.S.B.U.T.T.] have persuaded us that to do so would be imprudent in this fragile economy.
  • ******Participants may, however, add a merkin to their chest as long as such merkin is thoroughly washed, conditioned and blow-dried before being worn.

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